Teenager and social networks: how to watch him on Facebook and VKontakte

Is it ethical to follow the activity of a son or daughter in social networks? How to teach a child how to safely act on facebook and facebook? Tips for parents from experts in the field of adolescent psychology.

Child safety on the Internet

 

Facebook and other social networks have become almost a constant habitat for most children after school, and this is one of the reasons and for your presence in them. I will not delicate: if your children have social network accounts, you should have access to them. This is an indisputable fact.

Children's posts can affect all areas of their lives, including study, hobbies and entertainment, as well as job opportunities. In the chats teenagers bully each other, make appointments, chat, write off each other homework, find and lose friends. Ignoring this most important part of the social life of adolescents, you neglect your parental responsibilities. I know this sounds tough, but it's true.

I would advise you to "fuck" your children on Facebook and try to make them add you to "friends." If the children do this, then your next task is to hide and remain silent. Do not write on their wall a word, do not comment on their likes, posts and outposts.

Most likely, very soon your children will not remember that one of thousands of their "friends" is you, they will forget about your presence in the social network. It is at this point that you will open a new side of your sons and daughters. Now, if they write or place something completely unseemly - and the probability of this is high - you can talk to them alone about what they think they are about themselves.

Teenagers in social networks
How to protect a teenager in social networks

Choose the reasons for the conversation reasonably. Doubtful words and foul language can be ignored and not mentioned, but the mention of drinking or drugs should alarm you. You can leave without attention a harmless discussion, the topic of which you simply do not like. But it is necessary to insist that her daughter remove her pictures from the net in seductive poses.

Facebook, like other similar sites, in the near future will not go anywhere, so you need to consider it as a learning tool. This is a great place where you can study public opinion and create it. Here you can even make decisions, the results of which will be felt for many more years.

If I were you, I would not in any way tell the children that you can not use Facebook, because it's a powerful tool that plays a serious role in their life. But that's why you need to look after your children in this social network. "Tracking a Facebook page" on your part is by no means an invasion of the privacy of the child, because Facebook is nothing personal or purely personal. This, by the way, will be one of the most important lessons for your children.

If the child refuses to "zafrend" you into Facebook, then you have several options for how to proceed. First of all, you can force him to do this, threatening otherwise to close his account. However, if it comes to this, the child can start a new account and report it to all friends, so that your perseverance will not give you anything. That's why I usually do not recommend doing this.

The second option is to ask someone from friends or family members to "zafrend" your child, and then look after his page and tell you if there are grounds for alarm. I did it myself for my old friends, and everything worked fine. If friends had to deal with children about some posts on Facebook, they never reported that they had received information from me. They simply said: "This information is in the public domain, and everyone can find it if they want." Such conversations confuse children and once again remind them: posted to the network can see everyone - and any security measures are useless.

Internet addiction in adolescents

Freedom on the Internet can be dangerous

It is very important that you, in the role of face-to-face friends, behave correctly in relation to children. Keep track of their posts, watch the discussions unfold, but do not participate in them. In no case do not post photos of your children in the network and do not tell "funny stories" about them, without obtaining prior permission from them. Nothing so quickly leads to "rasfrenzhivaniyu", as laid out in the network "funny" picture of your teenager at the age of three, dressed up in a sister dress with collars. Let your Facebook page be dedicated to you. Show respect to your maturing children, because the image for them is very important.

Another of your duties is to monitor the appearance of new ways of social communication in the network. Here it is necessary to exert some efforts, as today children master new technologies faster than us. Ask the children to show their latest applications on the phones - and listen carefully to their comments: you will discover many things! Watch TV shows that discuss popular sites for teens: you can not afford to vegetate in the dark when it comes to technologies that absorb the lives of your children.

Your task is to find a balance in this and all other areas of your children's life. To do this, you must ask them to be honest with you. The second important condition: always listen carefully to what the children tell you. Be flexible and strong, adapt to circumstances. Help in solving any one problem and step aside. And do not forget to breathe.

From the book “Already an adult, still a child. Adolescent Studies for Parents »Rebecca Derlein

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